By Victor Schwartzman
September 9, 2013
It seems to be taking a long time for AODA to be fully or even adequately implemented. Nostradamus predicted that the Toronto Maple Leafs will win the Stanley Cup before AODA becomes a fact of life. His prediction sets a very high bar (in fact, he was high and in a bar at the time.)
What else is likely to happen before AODA is a reality and not mere words on paper?
Here is our top ten list of what will happen before AODA:
10. Monkeys will fly out of various politicians’ butts. (You knew this one was coming, so here it is! Free the monkeys! They deserve our support (the monkeys, not the politicians.))
9. Stephen Harper will quit politics and donate his time to help people he does not personally know. His piano music will become so emotional people will cry.
8. The careers lost to outsourcing will return so your children can quit those fast food jobs and move out, again.
7. The transit system in your community for people who have disabilities will reduce its rates, have reasonable wait times, give individual rides, never be late, never leave without warning if a passenger is late, have plenty of room for human or animal assistants, and have washroom facilities for long trips. This happened when Harry Potter came to Ontario and waved his magic wand.
6. Opposition politicians force the issue or the media pressures the Government or there is an indication that anyone other than people with disabilities cares.
5. Premier Wynne becomes the new quarterback for the Toronto Argos because she scrambles well under pressure, able to dodge anyone trying to pin her down.
4. Your father-in-law asks for your advice. Your mother-in-law tells you no one else could be a better match for her child. Your children think
you actually know something.
3. Reality, news shows and documentaries stop using disability porn for entertainment.
2. After people with disabilities live like everyone else anyway.
1. People no longer assume.
Next week: The Top Ten Apocalyptic Events The Government Fears Should AODA Be Fully Implemented!